Pooky’s Weekly Round-Up: Issue 129
Beneath the surface: understanding the struggles we can't always see
This week’s collection keeps circling back to the same truth: so much of what children are experiencing remains invisible to us. The child who seems fine but isn’t, the student who appears capable but genuinely can’t follow through, the anxiety that looks like defiance or disorganisation. When we understand what’s actually happening beneath the surface - whether that’s interoception struggles, executive function challenges, or an anxiety bucket that’s already full - we can move from pressure to support. I hope something here helps you see a child differently, or gives you language for what you’ve sensed but couldn’t quite name.
PRESENT: Anxiety in Class
These slides, from a session on supporting anxious students, explore ten practical, evidence-informed strategies you can use straight away - from breathing techniques to frameworks like If...Then... and TIGGER. Each slide is a bite-sized idea you can try tomorrow, tweak for your setting, or share with colleagues. Perfect for navigating visible meltdowns or quiet struggles alike, with a trauma-informed and neurodivergent-friendly approach built in throughout.
(To book me or to find out more about my talks and webinars, email pooky@inourhands.com )
DOWNLOAD: Feeling Safe, Calm & Happy
This simple tool helps you explore safe places, people, and things with anxious children - comparing what works at school versus home. The supporting notes guide you through using it conversationally, spotting gaps in a child’s support network, and understanding what genuinely helps them feel calm. Ideal for pastoral conversations with anxious, neurodivergent, or trauma-experienced children. Please share it widely.
WATCH: Interoception - understanding & supporting
If you’ve ever wondered why a child goes from fine to meltdown in seconds, or doesn’t ask for the toilet until desperate, interoception might be the missing piece. This video explains how many neurodivergent children genuinely struggle to perceive internal body signals, plus practical strategies like five-minute earlier prompts and body check-ins that actually help.
LEARN: Understanding Executive Functioning Challenges
When students seem disorganised, avoidant, or “just not trying,” executive functioning might be the missing piece. This lesson unpacks what’s really happening when a child’s brain self-management system is under strain, why “just focus” backfires, and how to spot when EF is running low. You’ll gain practical, low-pressure strategies that support regulation and self-worth without lowering expectations. Perfect for anyone puzzled by students who seem capable but can’t follow through. This complete module is currently free from my neurodivergent-friendly classroom course.
READ: The Parents’ and Professionals’ Simple Guide to PDA
This guide breaks down PDA with clarity and compassion. From understanding the anxiety bucket to navigating low-demand approaches, this book walks you through practical strategies rooted in autonomy, trust and connection. Perfect for parents finding their way and professionals who need to work differently with PDAers. It’s written with genuine warmth and over two decades of experience, making this feel less like a manual and more like sitting down with someone who truly gets it. (If you’re buying directly from Jessica Kingsley Publishers, the site-wide code POOKY20 gives you 20% off any of their books).
UNDERSTAND: “Just Try” - Why This Phrase Backfires
When anxious neurodivergent children hear “just try,” they’re actually hearing “this should be easy” and “everyone else can do this.” This carousel unpacks why the phrase creates an anxiety spiral rather than motivation, then offers genuinely helpful alternatives like scaffolding tasks into tiny steps and validating difficulty. Hopefully helpful reading for anyone supporting frozen, overwhelmed children.
JOIN: Emotional Regulation for Learning - FREE 90 Minute Webinar
Children cannot learn when they’re dysregulated - it’s neurologically impossible. This free webinar with myself and Ian Hunkin explores the window of tolerance framework, co-regulation practices, and strategies you can use straight away to help every child access learning. Ian’s work is brilliant (delightfully geeky in the best way), and we’re excited to share practical, brain-based approaches that genuinely make a difference. Open to anyone - register here and please do share widely.
CONFERENCE: Let’s Talk Wellbeing (Cheltenham Racecourse - March 2026)
I’m speaking at this conference run by Let’s Talk - a charity doing genuinely wonderful work around children’s mental health and wellbeing. The day at Cheltenham Racecourse brings together brilliant speakers (I’m excited to learn from them too), and I’ll be delivering quite a bit of content throughout. It’s a paid event but great value and genuinely worthwhile if you’re looking for quality professional development. It would be lovely to see some of you in person - find out more and book here.
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THANK YOU for reading - please forward this email to anyone who you think might find it helpful and feel free to use and share my resources.
If you’d like to support me to contine to share free resources, please consider joining me on patreon for £1 a month or invite me to deliver a webinar, INSET training or conference keynote.
Thanks, as always, for all that you do.
Until next time,
Pooky x
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Pooky Knightsmith, PhD, CPsychol, MA (Oxon)
Autistic Speaker | Author | Advisor | Assessor
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